Hipster Jew » iphone

Flaming Lips Blow Everyone’s Minds

IronyOnRye — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 22:53:03 +0000

The Flaming Lips do not give a fuck. They do whatever they want. Cover “Dark Side of the Moon” in it’s entirety? Yeah. Collab with Neon Indian? Check. Collab with Siri the iPhone voice? Did that too. Erykah Badu is also guesting in this cut, so if we have any fans of hers in the house, check that shit out. Wayne Coyne and his cohorts haven’t ever given a shit about how they’re received publicly, and they aren’t going to start caring now that they’re successful.

The Lips have figured out a way to use AutoTune in a song without actually using AutoTune, but I can’t tell if that’s good or terrifying. Anyway, it’s an interesting song for sure. Just be sure to listen to it before February 5th, when it goes offline. It might show up on an album or EP in the future, but for now just check it out below:

Hey Wayne, make a full-length collab with Neon Indian, not just an EP. Sorry. Thought you’d like to hear from the peanut gallery.

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Fook this Shite (Tales from Ireland)

Mikvah McElroy — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 20:02:25 +0000

So here I am, in my other homeland, sitting in my teensy dorm bed, wearing every sweater I own, trying to decide the most important things I have learned thus far in Ireland. This is what I’ve come up with in the last week.

1) Whipping out one’s MacBook Pro in an Irish lecture hall is a sure-fire way to alienate oneself and declare ones American-ity (largely the same thing, I have discovered.)

2)~~Determinedly~~ Absentmindedly playing Bejeweled on ones iPhone is a great way to not make you friends.

3)My desperation to not “blend in” is working. My cowboy boots immediately correct the notion (taken from my otherwise extremely Irish looks) that I am from Ireland. Because I’m not. I’m an Amurrican goddamit. And strangely proud of it? Leave it to me to become a patriot as soon as I leave the golden shores of Amerikay.

4)There is nothing worse then sitting in your Ancient Celtic Peoples and Cultures seminar and realizing that the bagel with lox you just scarfed (after realizing that lox exist on this island) has left you with lox-fingers. Now your fingers smell like fish. Awesome.

5)Pool is very different here: The ~~pockets~~ holes are smaller, sticks are shorter and the balls are tiny.

6) Cigarettes = Fags

7) Pants = underwear

Imagine my confusion.

I have an iPhone and I finally understand what the fuss was ‘all about’

Chicky — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 21:00:08 +0000

Finally! I am a 20th century man living in a 20th century world. I am free to jailbreak my iPhone and download all these apps I’ve been reading about in the NYTimes. Like there’s this ‘Angry Bird’ game which is wicked fun. Get this — I’m a bird, who kills pigs. PIGS! It’s like God has asked me to do his Kosher bidding.

And now I can use my Twitter regularly and The Duckman will stop calling me a ‘technologically out of touch hack”. I’ll reach atleast 100 twitter friends. And then they’ll see who is laughing. Oh they’ll see all right.

I can organize my life with my phone. For example, I opened up my ‘notes’ today and wrote down “I have an iPhone and I am finally not a loser”. And then I slightly modified the title to what it is now.

Sure, it may be a 3GS phone. But a 3GS phone is better than a piece of shit flip-phone circa 2005. UGHHH How did I ever have friends before this?!?!?!

Oh, and I instragramed a picture of myself that looks like it was taken for Myspace. If Myspace was invented in 1886! Sha-Zah!

First Step is Admitting You Have a iPhone Problem

Schlitz Lipz — Wed, 17 Aug 2011 19:35:07 +0000

I can’t stop taking pictures of adorable animals on my cool new iPhone.

I use a free app called Instagram.

Because this vintagey trend started with hipsters but is now big with everyone, I’m not sure if utilizing it makes me more of a hipster or less of one. Also not sure what having an iPhone makes me.

This is a very severe sort of identity crisis.

Someone save me. Please.

Special thanks to ze little cutie models (said in baby voice): Kobe, Jeefa, Loki, and Kitten Pants. Oh, and my sister.

OMG I GOT AN iPHONE [POLL]

The Duckman — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 21:00:06 +0000

Hey Hebros and Heebees,
Im like super kool now that I have an iPhone. Sry I havent been writing much. Too busy Instagraming my peen. Thx at+t. Without you Id be BBMing jappy chicks 24.7.

4SQ! CROTCH SHOT! ESPN APP! I feel so connect to the world.

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post’s poll.

What didn’t I regret from last night?

The Duckman — Mon, 28 Mar 2011 19:30:31 +0000

Where is the “regret buying an iphone” app?
Where is the “take back hooking up with snooki last night” app?
How about the “I didn’t actually mean to sext my dick to my old high school teacher” app?
Or what about the “I didn’t mean to finally stand up to my mother last night” app?
And they say there is an app for everything….

Saturday night in New Enlgand

Iphone gaffe

The Duckman — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 17:00:07 +0000

I always knew that when technology became self aware it was going to be homophobic and anti-semetic.

(thanks Whit-knee)

Living without a prayer or a smartphone

Chicky — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 21:45:02 +0000

Fuckin-a. People say that living off of your parents is cheap and easy. Maybe for the Duckman. But I’m still in college and still ‘forced’ to have my parents pay for my phone bill. And I’m not a trust-fund hipster. I was only allowed texting last year. Do you know who first started texting in 2009? 7 year old children. And me. Then my parents wonder why I can’t bring home a nice Jewish girl.

On top of that, they refuse to buy me a smartphone with a data plan. I feel terribly out of place everywhere I go. I still spend hours daily, pouring over obscure movie and music trivia facts, just so I can impress people with my obscure and bourgeoisie sophistication. Having a pretty face just isn’t enough to get by these days. But now all my friends call me out when I make a mistake. Who cares if it was Louis XII who was called ‘Le Père du Peuple’, and not James Earl Jones.

I heard rumors about this foursquare program that all the cool kids are using. I don’t know what it is. I know it’s not that amazing childhood sport that hipsters like myself still play. I do know that I can’t become the ‘Mayor’ of my local divebar, which means no free gravy fries with my $20 Monday night tab. I’m told all the cool kids use it to update their Twatter accounts, but I can barely understand how the Hipsterjew Twat works.

Look, this is pretty frickin embarrassing but I’m going to trust you wont tell any of my friends….I still have to print out Googlemaps for directions. The Duckman tells me most people use an ‘app’ for that, which I think is short for Apple Macintosh Computer.

Readers, all I want is a iPhone 4G. I wont complain about how shitty the service is. Ok, that’s a lie — it’s the reason I have this blog. But I’d appreciate it helluva lot more than you do. And it’s extremely hard to keep up on my Yahoo! News Updates (for the keywords ‘Jews’, ‘Hipsters’, ‘Williamsburg’, ‘Israel’, and ‘Bar Rafaeli naked’) without a 24/7 connection.

Bodega Living