Being a Hipster is not a real job

British Columbia, a place so unoriginal it’s named after two other countries, is spreading a terrible smear campaign against hipsters. Being a hipster isn’t a real job.

Well obviously being a hipster isn’t a real job, but it sure as hell is a full time gig. I mean just look at a laundry list of things I need to do before I can start any work today.

1. Get into my skinny jeans
2. Cash trust fund check
3. Troll bandcamp sites to write terrible reviews on bedroom bands.
4. Make a sandwich and take instagram photos of it
5. Throw away sandwich
6. Write a poem about the death of a sandwich

And this was all suppose to be done before 10am. I don’t get up until 12pm every day. And my list goes up to 200 daily things I need to do. Yeah, being a hipster doesn’t pay for shit. But I like to think I’m still contributing something to society. And frankly, I’m content if that something is even just a little more than “street litter.”