To all the Moms out there: Yes, I am single. And yes, I’d consider dating your daughter.
Sometimes friends message me and tell me “my Mom reads your blog and thinks you are hilarious!” This affirmation is second only to when my own Mom comments on the blog, which is always worth a chuckle. My parents will never understand me, my complex ideas, and my relationship with culture. PSHHHH.
The fact is, I’ve always been loved by Moms. Maybe it’s my boyish good looks. Or my witty sense of humor. Or the fact that I’m a fucking mensch and I’m not afraid to take out the trash (when I remember it’s smelling). So to all the Moms out there reading this blog, reading these posts, wishing your daughters could date me/marry me/love me/bear child with me, in that order, just remember: You know how to reach me. It’s called Who Wants an HJ. Now laugh and wish I was your future son-in-law.
Somehow this post isn’t nearly as self-fulfilling as I hoped it would be…