新年快!

What? There’s an excuse to be festive and drink a lot more than I should? There are dragons involved? Sign me up!

I just couldn’t resist this image.

Happy freaking Chinese New Year you adorable Hebrew/hebrettes!

It’s the year of the water dragon! I know this means very little to most of you, because you are too busy paying attention to Western horoscopes to worry about some Zodiac nonsense. But hey, there’s dragons involved. And Puff the Magic Dragon was a cool guy, so a whole dragon year can’t be bad.

Let’s celebrate this fun series of days the only way we, as Jews, know how.

Go to your local crappy Chinese place and order some chicken unkosher wonton soup!  Wash it down with some green tea! Have some frozen yogurt for dessert! Do some cool karate moves! Meditate! Work at a nail salon! Ride a panda! Read some anime! Crash your car! Go peepee in someone’s Coke! Other Asian stereotypes!

Bring it home, Long Duk.

*Yes. I did copy and paste the title of this article from a Chinese person’s facebook status. Don’t judge me.