If you don’t know hippie land’s most hippieful event, UVM’s Naked Bike Ride, it is an interesting juxtaposition: Full frontal nudity, typical to nudist colonies of the 70s, has been a cornerstone for the bros and biddies of UVM for the past couple decades. Yet recently the school has refused to support the beloved Naked Bike Ride.
So here are my 3 simple tip to surviving this year’s bike ride, which will certainly have a lot of peen and vag and tots, but not as many police officers protecting the drunks from themselves.
1) Watch out for cops.
2) Watch out for cops with pepper spray.
3) Protect your junk from a raging pepper-sprayed cop.
Don’t end up like this chick. Nobody wants to be in a meme.
Totally better than the Philly Nake Bike Ride.
