This Alcohol/Calorie chart will help you drink this weekend

Hipsters have a problem. Their high metabolism, their inability to eat healthy, exercise correctly, and avoid manorexia, means that hipsters are not getting the calories their bodies crave (unless you are a chubster). So this handy chart from getdrunknotfat.com will help me decide what I’m drinking this weekend. Unlike the name of the site, I will use it to get drunk AND fat. I obviously need to find something that is

• Cheap
• Will get me drunk
• High in alcohol content

1) Hard Liquor

Hpnotiq

Now you can get drunk in style at the club. With a modest 17% alcohol, and 888 calories per 12 ounces, this one is sure to stave off your manorexia. Won’t break the wallet if you buy it at the store, reasonably priced $20.99 for a 750ml bottle. Although you may get sick from chronic malnutrition.