You’ve gotta hand it to the black suits at BBC News for this news breaking report. Microbrews have gotten too expensive for the average welfare-suckling food-stamp mongering Brooklyn hipster.
It’s so easy to blame hipsters in these troubling times. But everyone’s gotta get drunk, and they wanna do it for cheap. So I don’t fault them for making moonshine, even if it hasn’t been cool since Prohibition and the First Great Depression. I do fault them for claiming to be too cheap for Pabst Blue Ribbon. No one is too cheap for Pabst. NOBODY.
One Brooklyn resident, who spoke on condition of anonymity, makes moonshine to her father’s recipe.
She says: “Growing up, me and my brothers watched our dad make moonshine in the bathtub. Now we do it.”
In her 20s and an aspiring musician, she is typical of the new breed of moonshiners. Rigged up in her kitchen is a gleaming copper still which she bought over the internet for several hundred dollars.
By day she works in a museum where many of her colleagues know about her illicit hobby.
Now BBC refuses to call this woman a hipster, but the signs are all there. 20-something years old? Check. Wants to be a musician? Check. Works at a fricken’ museum? Check. Too good for ten dollar bottles of vodka? Double check.
Isn’t it ironic that hipsters are now taking over the drinking habits of our backward Southern brothers? Too bad they forgot that there is nothing more American than ‘sin taxes’. Therefore they are all just a bunch of hipster commie bastards living in socialist Brooklyn.
Yup.
