OMG hipster babies are super gr8!

Another Hipster started a tumblr before I could steal their idea. This latest one revolves around hipster babies. And oh boy, lemme tell ya these children are adorable AND fashionable.

I’m an expert on the subject of children, since my line of work is teaching the little ones. So I expect everyone to agree with me when I say this site is just loaded with the cuuuuuuutest lil’ baybees in the universe.

I concocted a formula that will let me win in the wide world of tumblr. First, I am going to Hipster Wife Hunting and find myself a nice Jewish girl who (of course) is looking to have anywhere between 3 – 21 children. Then, I’m going to show my hipster wife this amazing site. I can picture the conversation now.

“Hey hunny bunny, we need to make sure our children end up as cool as these kids.”
“Why is that, Chicky?”
“Because if I had looked this hip at Jewish Day School, I’d have friends and wouldn’t be a social retard.”
“Hey! ‘Retard’ is an inappropriate and insensitive word.”
“Don’t worry sweetie, I’m just using it to be ironic.”

This kid deserves something for how cute he is. Maybe his own Disney TeeVee show? Atleast then his parents could cover his burgeoning shopping addiction at the soon-to-be created Baby American Apparel.

Now this is just good parenting.

Some hipsters (like The Duckman) are just born to be outrageous and pretentious a-holes.

Some of you more ‘reasonable’ network TeeVee viewers may cry foul. “What they’re doing to these children is terrible! They need to live their own lives! Hipsters sux dix! blah blah blah blah somebody please think of the children!”

I have thought about the children. And I approve.

There’s a really secret underground hipster saying that I happen to know because I’m super hip. It goes something like “If you’re gonna shit your pants, atleast look ridiculously ridiculously good while doing it.” The same applies to babies in diapers.