Every once in a while there is a post I don’t want to write but feel morally obligated to do. This one happens to be just so.
I was going to start off by saying ‘Glenn Beck is a douche’ but that’d be like saying ‘beer rocks’. It’s just so obvious it shouldn’t need to be said. And in case you forgot, us HipsterJews half-assed to fight Glenn with our own ‘Glenn Beck’ Haikus. Which is where the story begins.
Now, if Glenn Beck was a real man, he’d have experts on his radio show debating real issues. But no one on the radio is a real man, even Imus. He’s just another crazy dude hiding behind a telephone. Kinda like the Jerky Boys and their hilarious 1990s prank phone call cassettes.
Jewish Funds for Justice, the group that sponsored the Glenn Beck Haikus, got attacked the other day. They had made some claims about the positives of social justice, and Beck wanted to refute them. Like the idiot he is, he used the ‘Jew Card’ in a most chutzpadik manner. Here is what Glenn had to say:
BECK: God is truth. And he lights a fire. God changes hearts. God goes directly to your heart. Government goes directly to your wallet.
He [Jewish Funds for Justice President] says, “All of us are created in the image of the divine, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. To put God first in faith is to put humanity first.” Is that true? He then says, “This is a democracy.” No, it’s a republic. There’s a difference, you should look it up. “The government is you, me, and 300 million whom we share with our nation. Government is one way which we care for our neighbors, and tradition tells me to care for my neighbor as I care for myself. Here’s what we do for each other as Americans: We grow food, we create jobs, we build homes, pave roads, teach our children, care for our grandparents, secure our neighborhoods. Government makes our country function. To put God first is to put humankind first. To put humankind first is to put the common good first.”
This leads to death camps. A Jew, of all people, should know that.
This is exactly the kind of talk that led to the death camps in Germany. Put humankind and the common good first.
Help me out, how did that lead to death camps? How does that lead to death camps? Because that’s what they’ll say: “Oh, Glenn Beck is talking about death camps.” Help me out. Let’s think of this logically, and we can back it up with documentation. How does that lead to death camps?GRAY: Well, because if certain people are hurting the common good, they have to be removed from society.
BECK: They have to be liquidated. How about grandma and grandpa?
GRAY: Yeah, they’re pulling down the common good, they’re costing to society too much.
BECK: So we’re gonna have to let ‘em die. How about the handicapped?
GRAY: Well they hurt the race. They can’t pull their weight for the common good. They can’t produce for society.
BECK: If they also reproduce, are we gonna let imbeciles continue reproduce? It’s all the same argument. Once you get into the common good, it’s over. And this is the perversion that every minister, pastor, priest, bishop — every single person in America, every rabbi should be at the pulpit saying the same thing — get away from anyone who talks about the common good. Because the common good — if you put that first, and you reject individual — you are headed for the death camps.
Shit! I need to call my Rabbi immediately and warn him that he’s been preaching Nazi propaganda to my congregation for years! What will he say when he learns giving charity for Yom Kippur equates giving away free Lugers and Bratwurst to Nazis?
Is it a bit suspicious that Glenn Beck, a blond-haired blue eyed Christian is obsessed with Nazis? I know I should be offended by all of this, but Glenn has made me so desensitized to Nazis and Commies. It seems whatever I do will lead to their reemergence, so whats the point?
If you want to hear the clip, click below. I warn all listeners, Jewish and goy alike, that you may find yourself agreeing with Nazi philosophy after hearing it. Jk! But seriously, someone read WAAYYYYY too much Ayn Rand in highschool. And then never picked her books up again.
